I am going to dedicate this month's column to a very good friend of mine, Jan Tobiassen. Jan lives in Oldenburg in Germany and, naturally, is a keen Hibs supporter. I first met Jan in 1993 when we both studied history at Edinburgh University. I know what you're thinking - two educated Hibees, how can this be? Jan and I were talking about football and I convinced him to come and see Hibs v Celtic at Easter Road and since that day he has never looked back. This happened back in the days when we had to stand on the crumbley old East Terracing so Jan was not exactly impressed with his surroundings.

The game was a boring 0-0 draw as I remember. Why is it that whenever seats are put into a standing area it is then known as the stand? Fate seems to have linked Jan inextricably with the fortunes of Hibs. For instance, we were visiting the stadium on that cold January day in 1996 when Duff Jimmy dropped from the skies by helicopter. Jan bought a mug (no, not Rab Shannon) at the shop to take back to Germany with him and by some strange supernatural force he dropped it in Edinburgh airport and it smashed to pieces. If only we had recognised the enormity of this broken mug occuring on the day that Hibs signed Duffy we could have contacted the board and begged them to call off the deal. Alas hindsight is the most exact science of them all.

Jan's most recent stay in Edinburgh found him working as a languages assistant in Portobello High School for a year. While there he became friends with Thomas Flogel and our own Jimmy Boco and invited them to the school to speak to the pupils. Flogel invited Jan to Tynecastle on a few occasions and this gave him an opportunity to study the native Jambo at close quarters. Jan observed that for some reason most Jambos have beer-bellies, strange 70s style haircuts and, most oddly of all, moustaches. I was as perplexed as Jan was by his discovery and could offer no plausible explanation for this unique Jamboesque appearance. If any Leither readers can shed light on this puzzling enigma we would appreciate your contribution.

Jan, being a scholar, decided to investigate the cult of Jamboism further and found to his horror that our beloved Edinburgh Uni actually has a top-secret research facility that has replaced its laboratory rats with Jambos. Unfortunately there is no spooky 'X Files' type explanation for this strange arrangement and the university gave Jan an obvious and practical reason for it. It appears that tests have shown that Jambos are not as intelligent as rats. Jambos breed and reproduce quicker than rats. There is less chance of laboratory staff becoming emotionally attached to Jambos. Finally, there are some things that even rats will not do.

Jan has know returned home to Germany and has only the depressing thought of having to watch football matches featuring the likes of Bayern Munich, Borussia Dortmund and Werder Bremen as poor consolation for missing out on the Hibees glorious quest for the First Division championship. Still, I will be sure to let him know what he is missing.